I’m Josh Macuga with newsfeed.
NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell said former Ohio State Star Criminal, I mean star quarterback, Terrelle Pryor will be eligible for the NFL supplemental draft. For those of you who have no idea what the NFL supplemental draft is, it’s like the actual draft but with way less pomp and circumstance. Basically it’s like watching porn but with no nudity, you see there’s bad play and desperate people striving for one last chance at stardom. Terrelle Pryor was a decent college quarterback who sold everything from signed jerseys to used jock straps to get free tattoos and cars, which is against NCAA rules. Shocker… One time in college I sold a desk to a friend for a case of beer. It was awesome. However, Pryor’s indiscretions landed him in a heap of trouble with the NCAA, so he fled said trouble like Khloe Kardashian running from her Jenny Craig sponsor. However Pryor made the call to flee the trouble a little too late and missed the real draft… his bad. Enter the supplemental draft. Now… the NFL will be imposing a 5 game suspension on Pryor or, TP as bathroom attendants like to call him, in accordance with the NCAA. Good luck TP, I hope you wipe the field with them.