Bad news for all you guys who are looking for a down-to-earth, talented, intelligent girl who never asks to be the center of attention: Kim Kardashian is off the market. She got hitched to NBA Forward Kris Humphries over the weekend in a wedding that cost an estimated 10 million dollars! Wow, I mean, that’s a million for every month they’re going to be married! There were a number of celebrity guests, including alcoholics Demi Lovato & Lindsay Lohan. Hope it wasn’t open bar. Kimmy wore an expensive dress by Vera Wang, her mother Kris wore a facelift, and her step-father Bruce Jenner wore confusion. After dealing with this family for a few months, it’s safe to say that Kris Humphries will be praying for the NBA lockout to end ASAP. Quick shout out to Ray J: You’re music’s awful & you’re a douche on TV, but making a sex tape & them dumping Kim shortly thereafter-easily the most likeable thing you’ve ever done.