A lot of girls at Burning Man keep waving their hands in the air like they just don’t care, but down deep I think they do.
If you don't drink a two liter of Mountain Dew every day, then I don't know what you are but you are not a man.
This is what your parents paid for you to go to college for, right? Getting fucked up in a field for three days at a music festival and rolling around in glitter?
'Babe I don't know what happened, I was at the aquarium looking at the octopus when ALL OF A SUDDEN...'
You know what? I don't think you guys are getting it. We want memes that make United look good, not bad.
'You know how it's fun to look up the popular mean girls that made you miserable in High School and see how they turned out She's 30. '
When you're at that age where you don't know what the hell to do to impress people.
‘I was scared for the future because I didn't know what's coming up next and how I would be able to have my own family one day.’