Tell my wife I love her. Also, I forgot to mention that my wife is Alanis Morissette.
'My wife's turtle, Speedbump, went missing in the yard 20 years ago. My MIL found him this year and broke the news to my wife in a present.'
She can’t wait to introduce the dog to her new pet if the dog ever comes back. Where is the dog?
This only took a few minutes to clean up, but these bras belong to my dead wife. WHY WOULD KIDS DO THIS!?
We found Waldo. What's he doing in my wife's underwear? Waldo! Get out of there!