'Well, it says right here on your resume that you're a lion, you're hired!'
Or just get two lady friends to agree to say they are your wife and lover. Free food!
Or wait five whole goddamn minutes before shoving food into your face, eh?
Floating Cooler: You'll need food to survive for up to possibly a week, so pack non-perishables in a floating cooler so your food will stay high and dry.
Park like a dick so you can swing your huge set of balls out of the car like a pro.
What was the best revenge you ever got for someone who parked in your spot?
When you go to the water park on your day off and everyone else had the same idea. FML.