This drunk man managed to put on a mascot costume and then throw up. Watch out!
This man is so drunk that he doesn't even know that Tom Hanks is his best friend. Watch out!
This man is drunk, but he could also be a vampire. Vampires sleep standing up, right? Regardless, watch out!
Hey man, quit laying around. Get it? Because he blacked out while buying Lay's potato chips? Watch out!
Pooping in a garbage can is either this man's rock-bottom or tip-top. Watch out!
If you want to raise a real man, just let your child watch every episode of JAG. That'll sort him out.