There are a million fish in the sea, and you go for the one stuck in a fisherman's net for the next 8-10 years?
When you think it’s going to be a subtle toot and it turns into a volcano.
When you could go to the beach and not worry about what's happening at the office.
When you think you listed cool shit as your about me but it's actually cringe-worthy.
Come on. Admit it. When you saw this ride you started thinking about eggplants.
This dumpster fire is so out of control that it set everything around it on fire. If you think about it, it’s like a less bad version of a recent 2016 Presidential Election.
When you go trick or treating and the people who answer the door are more scary then what ya’ll dressed as.
There you go, Revenge Bot, flying off the handle again. No one needs to know about the time you magnetized your ex or your addiction to transmission fluid.
‘I like everything about my transformation, I feel like I'm a woman again, when you go through cancer you feel so weak, sick and frail.’