'I'm a big fan of the SAW series, and I want that to be apparent when people use the bathrooms I design.' - This carpenter.
'I am embarrassed about the contents of this cupboard and no one may see my shame.' - This carpenter.
This roommate secretly wants to be a carpenter and build houses for a living. Go for it, roommate!
Michael Myers teaching John Carpenter everything he knows about making horror movies.
Is that old guy who sat next to him on The Apprentice going to be his Chief of Staff?
Nevermind. I stand corrected. Dogs with human teeth are terrifying. I think we need a palette cleanser.
'People love crawling on the ground to fetch toilet paper after using the bathroom, right?' - This carpenter.