Clickbait has become a bit of an internet scourge these last few years. It’s not just giving your article of video an exciting name, it’s giving it a name that almost makes it seem like a viewer has to click on it or their lives will be forever ruined. And, if it’s true clickbait, the actual product will never deliver on the promise of the title. Like these things –
#10 – Women? What Are They?
What You Think: This is a tough one. 12 women that exist? Do you mean we thought were fictional? Is that Charlize Theron as Aeon Flux, are you suggesting Aeon Flux exists? Plus 11 other fictional ladies? Or just that 12 women exist?
What It Was: On the site we found it on, it was a malware rollercoaster of misdirection, pop up ads and nearly impossible navigation. Oh, and a list about women who are physically unusual, like a tattooed woman, and a lady with giant legs.
Better Title: “You Won’t Believe How Much Malware This Will try to Install” or “Freakshow Ladies”
#9 – Eggs and a Side of Intrigue
What You Think: This lady with an egg and a mug is about to magic up the coolest party, free money, naked lady rollercoaster you’ve ever experienced.
What It Was: A 90 second video showing you how to make microwave meringue.
Better Title: “Here’s How to Make Microwave Meringue” or “90 Seconds Of Your Life You’ll never Get Back”
#8 – The DIY Bandito
What You Think: Illegal but cool DIY project? Did he build his own nuclear reactor? A flying car? Some kind of Pacific Rim style Jaegar?
What It Was: Goddammit. This guy made graffiti out of moss. He just grew moss on a wall. In the shape of letters and whatnot.
Better Title: “Moss for Fun and Profit” or “Chia Pets v2.0”
#7 – Grilled Wha?
What You Think: It finally happened, someone invented cheese that turns you into a superhero!
What It Was: Notice how the bread on the sandwich looks kind of funky? It’s because it’s not bread. They ground up some cauliflower goo, pressed it flat, baked it and then made it into a sandwich.
Better Title: “Here’s Some Crap you Can Eat” or “How to Ruin a Grilled Cheese Sandwich”
#6 – What’s Inside of Me?!?
What You Think: Like a pants goblin or something? Is this chick the source of an alien invasion? Put her damn pants back on and save the rest of us!
What It Was: She was pregnant. With a human baby. For real.
Better Title: “There is No News Today” or “Sex Ed Fails Again”
#5 – Ray Charles Reborn
What You Think: It’s Cyclops from the X-men! Duck before your face burns off!
What It Was: Her eyes are closed for literally less than a second. She’s just a little girl singing with a somewhat mature sounding voice. You know, like in every video of an incredible little girl singing.
Better Title: “Here’s Another Little Girl Who Sounds Older Than She Is” or “Girl Sings and Doesn’t Do Anything Jaw Dropping, In Case you Were Waiting For That”
#4 – World War Hot Chick
What You Think: Is this hot Asian lady going to kill us all? I didn’t even do anything!
What It Was: A video that seems to be suggesting the Treasury will cause WWIII
Better Title: “Valium” or “We’re Going Broke!”
#3 – Your Movies Are Terrible
What You Think: That you have no idea what a good movie is, obviously, and this site is about to correct you for your own good.
What It Was: A list of movies you probably never liked such as Pearl Harbor and 13 Ghosts and vague reasons why they’re not as awesome as you apparently thought they were.
Better Title: “Sucky Movies That You May Have Enjoyed” or “I Failed Film Criticism Class”
#2 – Waffle Iron of Doom
What You Think: The waffle iron exploded and maimed her so badly you’ll throw up if you even think of cooking ever again.
What It Was: She, uh, cooked the eggs.
Better Title: “How to make an Omelet in a Waffle Iron” or “Waffle Irons Ain’t Just for Waffles Anymore!”
#1 – The Unreal Divers
What You Think: These kids are jumping into shark-filled lava!
What It Was: A swimming pool.
Better Title: “Here’s a Video About Pools” or “I Hope My Editor Fires Me for This”