Who Caused The OK Tornadoes: Obama Or Kevin Durant?

markpotts by markpotts on May. 22, 2013

The devastation in Oklahoma is absolutely depressing. Many dead, millions of dollars of damage, and who is to blame? Well, if you said, "There’s no one to blame. It's a natural disaster," then some would think you were 100% incorrect.

 

Conspiracy theorists are having a field day with the Oklahoma tornadoes, somehow blaming the government. You know, the government that can't spy on journalists without getting caught or pass a bill to save its life or figure out health care (Canada figured out health care before us. CANADA). You know, that government. Because of HAARP.

 

So majestic... so evil...

 

The High Frequency Active Auroral Research Program is an unclassified research station in the middle of nowhere, Alaska, funded by the Pentagon, and used by the Air Force and Navy to study how radio waves work within the Earth’s atmosphere.

 

But that sounds too... normal. Conspiracy theorists say this station is used for nefarious purposes, such as flipping the earth’s magnetic poles, triggering earthquakes, burning up the sky, controlling minds, and creating (drumroll) tornadoes.

 

And why? Well, to hide government problems of course! This time, the conspiracy nuts are saying Obama ordered the Oklahoma tornadoes to take focus off his current problems with the media, Benghazi, and poor basketball skills. And we can’t forget when people said George W. Bush used HAARP to cause Hurricane Katrina to distract from his presidential woes.

Can we really trust someone that uses Bing?

But the government is too easy to blame. Maybe the blame goes higher, like to God...

 

Westboro Baptist Church is blaming Kevin Durant, the star of the Oklahoma City Thunder basketball team, because he didn’t immediately call for the death of Jason Collins, an NBA player who came out gay. And because of that, God punished his state’s team.

 

Wait a second... thunder are signs of storms... which cause tornadoes... which HAARP creates... because Obama ordered it.

 

Obama is... God?

 

See? Conspiracy theories are stupid and lead you to moronic conclusions.

 

- Mark (follow on twitter)

 

24 comments
Sigmarlboro
Sigmarlboro

What is haarp? Are we haarp? Is haarp, haarp?

Sigmarlboro
Sigmarlboro

What is haarp? Are we haarp? Is haarp, haarp?

Aggies77
Aggies77

I just want to let you know that Canada hasn't "figured out" health care, they socialized it, which means hippie liberals think its great, and right wing nut jobs think its part of the NWO.

Aggies77
Aggies77

I just want to let you know that Canada hasn't "figured out" health care, they socialized it, which means hippie liberals think its great, and right wing nut jobs think its part of the NWO.

Chucktacular
Chucktacular User

Pretty moronic to dismiss haarp's possible weather control abilities based on some dumb@$$ people preaching theory as fact.

CaptainHindsight
CaptainHindsight

Pretty moronic to dismiss haarp's possible weather control abilities based on some dumb@$$ people preaching theory as fact.

The-Langolier
The-Langolier UserTop Commenter

Does ANYONE outside of the Westboro Baptist Church like them? What a spot of blight on American soil. Thanks for the reference links, break.

The-Langolier
The-Langolier

Does ANYONE outside of the Westboro Baptist Church like them? What a spot of blight on American soil. Thanks for the reference links, break.

Obiwayne66
Obiwayne66 User

It's because of the dirty homosexuals wanting to treated like everyone else.

Obiwayne66
Obiwayne66

It's because of the dirty homosexuals wanting to treated like everyone else.

katieunder74
katieunder74

Samantha. I can see what your saying... Leroy`s remark is impossible... I just purchased a great Honda NSX from earning $8465 this past four weeks and just over 10-k last-month. this is really my favourite-work Ive had. I started this 10-months ago and immediately startad bringin in minimum $84... p/h. I went to this site,, KEP2.COM

katieunder74
katieunder74

Samantha. I can see what your saying... Leroy`s remark is impossible... I just purchased a great Honda NSX from earning $8465 this past four weeks and just over 10-k last-month. this is really my favourite-work Ive had. I started this 10-months ago and immediately startad bringin in minimum $84... p/h. I went to this site,, KEP2.COM

brnknot
brnknot User

Its true God hates Americans

brnknot
brnknot

Its true God hates Americans

theomis
theomis

socialism is everywhere, still much better than a dictatorship which the U.S has been for decades

theomis
theomis

socialism is everywhere, still much better than a dictatorship which the U.S has been for decades

llga01
llga01 User

obama is a homosexual too you know.

llga01
llga01

obama is a homosexual too you know.

Sigmarlboro
Sigmarlboro

Yup, multiple lovers at old church, now dead... Spooky

Sigmarlboro
Sigmarlboro

Yup, multiple lovers at old church, now dead... Spooky