What Do Men Notice About Women First?

What do you think men notice about women first? No matter what you say, you’re wrong because you probably said “breasts.” According to one study, breasts is the THIRD thing men notice.

70 percent of 1,000 men asked stated the eyes were the first thing they noticed. Next, the smile. Then breasts.

There are a few things wrong here. First, it’s wrong. We all know it. Men like looking at breasts. It’s not our fault. We were born this way. It’s in our genes. A recent study revealed that 90 percent of men would change this about themselves if they could.*

Yes… eyes…

Second, the study claims eyes are the first thing men notice. That’s convenient considering the study was commissioned by Murine eye drops. You know what you don’t put eye drops on? Boobs.

Third, it sorta makes sense you’d scan over eyes and mouth before you get to boobs. Don’t you want the woman you’re staring at to have eyes and a mouth? Like, if you looked and saw no eyes, let alone a head, would you still be interested in the boobs? As fellow Break editor Ian Fortey said, “I always want to make sure a woman has a head before I look at her boobs, otherwise it’s disrespectful to the family of the decapitated.”

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I searched Google for “woman with no head” and found this. I have no clue what it is. However, I noticed her boobs first.

Lastly, this study doesn’t take into account the amount of time taken on each body part. If you notice eyes first for two seconds, is that more important than noticing boobs third but for 10 minutes?

The study also reveals how women look at men. Conveniently, eyes are first again. Then smile, height, and hair. No where does it mention “crotch bulge” which is BS since the socks I use provide a mighty fine crotch bulge that women love to sorta look at then make a face like they are grossed out (but I know what’s up, flirty lady).

– Mark (follow on Twitter)

*this study doesn’t exist