What Guys Don’t Understand About Hot Girls Online

Do you ever chat to girls on Twitter? Follow a celebrity’s Facebook?  Instagram?  Subscribe to their Cyberduke?  We live in an unprecedented age of access to people we could only dream of speaking to even 10 years ago – every day people are tweeting to celebrities and hearing back from them in an ego-boosting kind of bizarre pseudo interaction that is both thrilling and bizarre for us little people.  But there’s also unprecedented access to models, cam girls, porn stars, singers and actors that are just hot as hell and who are willing to interact with us in return.  For many guys this is like the keys to a fantasy kingdom in which we have no idea what we’re doing.





What the hell is a boob and how do I use it?

In an effort to improve your interactions with the hottest ladies you could ever hope to meet, be they professional models or just a really cute girl you met at the club, I interacted with a few of my own hot friends to get their insight into what guys do wrong when it comes to approaching ladies online. 

To start, let’s meet the ladies; 



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Jessica Vaugn is a glamor model, a writer, a make up artist and a woman who is smart as a whip and charming to boot.  She stood me up once in LA.  I’m not bitter.  Check out her site (some of those images are NSFW) and read her column over on The Smoking Jacket .




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Next up is the very beautiful Ariel Rebel (NSFW? Yeah) French-Canadian porn star, model, entrepreneur and incredible chef.  Not only is she cute as a bug’s ear, she’s super nice and can make you a 5 star meal all while looking jaw-droppingly gorgeous.  We have a date scheduled to have poutine someday.  Someday.




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Finally we have cam girl Ambercutie (by now you know this could be NSFW) who makes her living on the internet performing for guys just like you while maintaining a normal, real life off camera, giving her untold perspective unto the mind of the online dude.



Now I need you to consider your own interactions with women you find attractive online, and then those you’ve witnessed from other guys.  Keep those in mind.  We’ve all seen this stuff before.  But it keeps repeating.  Good God does it repeat.  And it repeats for every woman out there.  So every time you approach a girl with a suave line about how you think she’s a goddess, literally 1000 guys said that already this week.  This is for you, men.  Sorry if it hurts.

Ladies – do guys ever approach you as though you need to be rescued?  Telling you about how they would take you away from whatever you do and give you a wonderful, new life?



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What would most people be surprised to learn about what you have to do in a day?  There’s more to it than just being hot, right? Probably.



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So since your life isn’t you just looking hot all day, what do you wish more people understood about what you do?



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How often are guys trying to pick you up, anyway?



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What are our important take aways from all this?  A couple of things that we can condense to important bullet points, for maximum absorption.

  • Women online are still actual people, like your sister or your mom or even you.
  • Just because you see someone in a bikini, or lingerie, or even naked, doesn’t mean they want to have sex with you.
  • When you see these women, online, in a bikini, or lingerie, or naked, it’s because that’s what they do for a living.  It’s a job.  Not a club where they’re desperate to meet hot, single WoW players.
  • Your charming and unique pick up lines are actually tired and old.  Worse, these ladies are at work and do not want to be “picked up.”  It literally will never happen.

The most important thing any man needs to realize about any woman, from a frumpy librarian to a drop dead gorgeous model is that they’re not a different species.  There’s no secret or method to gaining an upper hand with them because they’re not game that you’re hunting.  At the end of the day this is the problem with a certain subset of dudes out there who approach every interaction with a woman like it’s an opportunity to deceive her into sex or take her out like a deer that never saw the hunter coming.  Why live your life like that?  Maybe talk to people and make friends.  Or we could just ask the ladies what they think you should do.



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You can talk to Ian online @IanFortey.  No guarantees he’ll keep his clothes on.