Too busy to pay attention to the news this weekend? No worries, we’ve got you covered for this morning with a wrap up of everything you need to know that’s buzzing online from today and the weekend with bite-sized chunks of infotainment! Or maybe it’s entermation. Is that a thing?
It’s Canada Day!
In 1867, Canadians decided to politely become their own nation and thus Canada was born about 100 years after the US achieved independence. Canada Day is a lot like the 4th of July – there’s fireworks, barbecues, drunken uncles. The main difference is the amount of poutine Canadians consume on the day. Never had poutine? It’s French fries covered in cheese curds and gravy. It’s 100 times better than Justin Bieber.
The BET Awards
The BET awards were hosted by Chris Tucker who is still a thing. The consensus online seemed to be that Tucker was pretty funny 10 years ago and currently, in 2013, it is not 10 years ago. Also of note was a performance by Chris Brown in which he did not assault Rhianna or Nicki Minaj, with whom he was singing and Mariah Carey being accused of lip synching. R Kelly even showed up to sing and not pee on or commit a criminal act with anyone. It was an interesting night.
Penguin and Random House Are One
Two of the biggest publishing houses in the world are now the one biggest publishing house in the world. In a £2.4 billion merger (that’s about $3.6 billion American), the company will be rebranded as Penguin Random House. Oh, very clever name. Who thought of it? The entire world is well aware of how awesome it would have been to just call the company Random Penguin, but apparently publishing books has nothing to do with creativity these days.
Head Transplants Are Good to Go
You ever see those crazy old Russian photos of two headed dogs and stuff? That was a thing they tried to do back in the day and now is something we can do with real people! OK, maybe not two heads, but the technical issues preventing a head transplant have been sorted out. A head transplant. Try to imagine the weirdness of being the first person who ever has to undergo this surgery and then way up with a body that doesn’t feel or look like their own. You would probably gross yourself out every single day. Plus be in constant fear of your head being rejected and rotting off.
JLo Loves Dictators
Jennifer Lopez attended the birthday party of Gurbanguly Berdymukhamedov. Not familiar with that jumble of vowels and consonants? He’s the dictatorial leader of Turkmenistan and responsible for countless human rights violations, something JLo and her entourage didn’t bother to Google before the gig was booked. Her choreographer took to Twitter the day of her performance to praise how lovely Turkmenistan is and give a shout out to his Turkmenistan followers who, of course, don’t exist because Twitter is banned there.