Welcome to a new week, a new month and a new attitude! Wait, no, we couldn’t afford the new attitude, we have the same old one. Oh well, enjoy the news.
The Greatest Man Ever
This story is about an 80 year old man who fell off a cliff while fighting a bear. And he survived. In a perfect world the rest of this story would just be about him drinking tequila with hot women in a limo full of gold, but for the sake of whatever limited journalistic integrity we have, we’ll tell it like it is. Yusuf Alchagirov, an 80-year-old Russian shepherd, was hanging out in a raspberry field as 80 year old Russian shepherds are wont to do when a hungry bear intruded on his awesomeness. Because Yusuf is a badass, he refused to let a bear be the death of him and counterattacked by kicking and headbutting the bear repeatedly. The bear responding by knocking Yusuf off of a cliff, which broke some ribs. That, and a few bite wounds, had him in the hospital, but otherwise he was fine. According to Yusuf, the bear would have killed him if he didn’t fight back. No word on if he plans to hunt down the bear once his ribs heal and teach it the meaning of respect.
Herbal Supplement or Rice and Weeds?
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Do you buy pills of the sort that are legal and meant to improve your overall health in a natural way? Odds are if you don’t, someone you know does since the herbal supplement business is a $5 billion a year industry. And for that much money, you’d expect there would be some evidence that supplements work beyond the anecdotal. However, researchers in Canada has just use DNA testing to show that the majority of brands of herbal supplements are not what they claim to be and many contain things like ground up soybeans, rice and weeds, just random filler material. Some pills have none of the claimed medicinal ingredient inside. Of 44 supplements tested, one third contained something else entirely. So if you like to gamble, buy some herbals today!
Goodbye Mrs Krabapple
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Marcia Wallace, the voice of Simpsons character Mrs. Krabapple, died late last month of cancer. Her character is being retired from the show, one of the rare times in the Simpsons long history a character has disappeared from the roster.
Make a Wish, Batman
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If you live near San Francisco, keep your eyes peeled on November 15th as the Make-A-Wish Foundation seeks to make a 5 year old Leukemia patients dream of becoming Batman come true. The foundation is going all out for Miles, not just giving him a costume, but the Batmobile, Robin, two supervillains, an official call for his help from the chief of police and a cast of thousands helping out around town.
Miles Batman will have to fight both the Riddler and the Penguin to rescue a damsel in distress and save the city by way of a car chase (presumably Robin will be driving), all ending with Batman being thanked for his help and getting the key to the city at City Hall. Hopefully Miles kicks some ass and enjoys his day.
The Nazi Stash
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1,500 paintings, worth about $1.4 billion, have been discovered in a private apartment in Germany. The works, featuring art by Pablo Picasso, and Henri Matisse, were confiscated by Nazis during the Second World War and found in the apartment of a Bavarian man two years ago, surrounded by trash.
The art was sold to an art dealer sometime in the 1930s or 40s who then passed the art onto his son. The son would occasionally sell a piece when he needed money and live off the proceeds. Authorities caught him travelling from Switzerland to Munich with undeclared cash. After investigating, they discovered his collection in the dark, dirty apartment. Under German law, such works are to be returned to their rightful owners whenever possible, though many thousands of pieces of art are still missing.