The Daily Wrap: August 27th Staff by Staff on Aug. 27, 2013

Hope everyone is having a good morning, now let us ruin it with some infuriating news.  And maybe one or two happy stories, if you’re good.

George Zimmerman Wants Money

Hey look, another Zimmerman story because everyone liked that man… Anyway, George Zimmerman is back in the news because he would now like the state to cover his legal bills since he was acquitted.  In Florida, the state is required to cover the costs if a defendant is acquitted, so that’s going to be upwards of $300,000 in addition to the $900,000 the state already spent trying to prosecute him.  Justice has a steep price in Florida.


Trump The Conspiracy Theorist

Terrible person and multiple-filer for bankruptcy Donald Trump is newsworthy again, but this time it’s because he’s being sued for running a scam school.  The school was supposed to give students lessons in becoming rich the Trump way and in an ironic way it did by being kind of bogus and dishonest.

Trump says the whole thing is hogwash and he probably really used that word and has decided that the whole lawsuit, brought about by the New York Attorney General is politically motivated and probably Obama’s fault.  Because the President spends his days thinking of ways to ruin a sideshow attraction.


Science Destroys Horniness in Bugs

Oh science, you so crazy!  Scientists at Kansas State and in South Korea have not only discovered but managed to shut down a neuropeptide (some amino acids) in bugs that control sexual desire and the need to mate.  Basically they removed chemicals from a bug’s brain and turned them into disinterested housewives (or lazy, disinterested husbands).  While the gist of this story seems to have something to do with pest control – you could really cut down on mosquitos if you convinced them not to reproduce, let us never forget that to the scientifically illiterate this makes us all fearful that science will soon find a way to eliminate horniness in mankind!


Jon and Kate Plus Cyber Hate

Remember Jon and Kate Gosselin?  Probably not because if you watched that show and also go to Break, you may be a sociopath.  Anyway, the show was on TLC and was about two really objectionable people who had too many kids.  Eventually they got divorced as they were objectionable even to each other.  Since then, Jon has been a douchebag while Kate has tried very hard to not let people realize what a douchebag she is, even though she clearly is.  Well they’re in the news again as Kate is suing Jon for stealing her computer and hacking her phone for a tell-all book.  We’re no experts but we’re going to be impressed if there’s a reality star outside of Beauty and the Geek who knows how to hack a phone.


Walmart vs Starbucks: The Shamening

In a blind taste test, Wal mart brand coffee scores just as well as Starbucks coffee despite costing half as much, proving the vast majority of coffee drinkers have no idea what they’re doing.  The test, conducted by Consumer Reports, also pointed out that if you use K cups, you’re paying just about as much as you would if you went to a coffee shop per cup and getting inferior product since grinding your own beans and brewing at home does taste better.  So basically the entire coffee industry is insane.