2014 GRANNY AWARDS Celebrating The Best Of The Internet

While everyone is reviewing last night's Grammy Awards, we decided to celebrate the Granny Awards of the internet, giving individual awards for the various achievements to those grannys who know how to really weird us out.  Ladies and gentleman, this year's Granny Award winners in the following categories are...

The award for Most Hipstery Granny To Not Be Invited But Still Join The Party

The award for "I come here to cat call the guy using the elliptical"


The award for Most Nightmare-Inducing Goblin To Roam The Earth

The award for If You Wanna Borrow My Pen, Come And Get It

The award for Happiest, Blindest Crazy Person To Think Alex Trebek Is Actually In The Room

The award for What Beach Is This And Why We Shouldn't Stay Away

The award for Best Use Of Time In A Retirement Community

The award for Most Impressionable Granny To Watch Pink On The Grammys

The award for Best Stocking Stuffers From Someone Who Talks To A Two-Dimensional Racoon

The award for Most Unnecessary Stretch When All You Can Do Is Sit Anyway

The award for Most Likely To Cause An Accident Please Just Stay Home

The award for Wait Til You See The Appetizer, You Son Of A Bitch

The award for Least Likely To Die Of Old Age

The award for Most Comparible Young Butt To Old Breasts

The award for Best Sea Witch To Finally Come Ashore And Hang Out

The award for Best Duo To Utilize A Big Bang Theory Commercial Break

The award for I Taught Him Well Now Go Get Me My F*cking Lighter

- Todd Spence (twitter)