Lesson Learned: Teacher Fired For Wildly Inappropriate In-Class Questionnaire

What just happened to a middle school teacher who gave her students a wildly inappropriate questionnaire during a “Leader In Me” class on “accepting people’s differences”?

A. Her tendency to use wildly inappropriate questionnaires was accepted by everyone as one of her differences

B. She was lauded by the Huffington Post as the Anti-Patriarchy Hero of the Day

C. The students renounced racism, nationalism and embraced gender fluidity

D. She was fired.

 

In what state did this occur?

A. Inebriation.

B. Manic.

C. Depressive.

D. Florida.

 

How did a parent describe the question "How comfy are you if you see a group of black men walking to you on the street?”

A. “That’s a poor question to ask a child because you didn’t describe if their hair is in cornrows.”

B. “That’s a good question to ask a child because I’m taking my kid to see Fetty Wap in concert next week.”

C. “That’s a silly question to ask a child because we’re outspoken segregationists.”

D.  “That's completely inappropriate. In no world, whatsoever, is that okay to question a child on.”

 

What would be a more appropriate subject matter for seventh graders?

A. Memorizing the Koran

B. Practical LSD manufacture

C. Handgun cleaning and maintenance

D. Like math and science and stuff

 

Answer to all of the above: D.

Here’s a page from the questionnaire.

It asks student to gauge their imagined comfort with hyptheticals like "The woman sitting next to you on a plane weights 250 lbs" and "Your dentist is HIV positive." It's important to note that there are no wrong answers here, provided that you answer every hypothetical with "completely comfortable."

What is America going to look like in 50 years?

A. A mutlicultural paradise, where everyone is the color of a mochacchino and prime time sitcoms are in Spanish

B. A Marxist paradise, where everyone is equally successful and we're cured of Islamophobia

C. A colony of China

D. I plan on being dead long before that