Surfer Tries To Surf Dead Whale Carcass Being Eaten By Great White Sharks

Surfers are generally portrayed in movies and TV shows are careless airheads who couldn’t string together a sentence without putting at least three or four “Whoa’s” in it.

Australian for “dumbass.” 

The stereotype may be unfair but one Australian surfer isn’t helping to change that notion since he was caught on camera surfing the carcass of a dead whale. Watch here:

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Harrison Williams was down at the beach with his best buds (not that kind, although we wouldn’t be surprised if we’re wrong) and a video camera when they came across the floating whale corpse. Rather than call the authorities to inform them of the situation and try to think of inappropriate poses for their Vine channel before the removal crew arrived like any sane person would, Williams decided he’d try and take it for a ride. So he swam out to a rock, waited for the dead whale to float by and jumped on its rotting back while riding it like the world’s smelliest surfboard. 

Yeah, that’s pretty much how we pictured him in our mind when we read the story although he was drooling a lot more. 

He’s not going to face any fines or charges because Australia law clearly states that people cannot ride or harass LIVING animals and he didn’t take any part of the whale carcass with him. He also managed to circumvent the laws of evolution and natural selection by not injuring himself or being killed despite the fact that a school of great white sharks were still circling the dead whale. Then again, maybe the sharks refused to try and eat him because they were due to take some kind of mandatory drug test and didn’t want to have the mangled corpse of a THC-riddled beach bum in their urinary tract.