Silly Hand, You’re Not a Foot!

A Chinese man, Xiao Wei has learned a valuable lesson about workplace safety; don’t stick your hand in the machines.  He won’t be playing piano any time soon, but thanks to doctors he still has his hand. They grafted the severed appendage onto his ankle after it was cut off during a workplace industrial accident. In addition to having to buy hand shaped shoes, now he has to worry about getting “athletes hand” – am I right?

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 After the machine was unplugged and his hand retrieved Xiao was taken to a hospital where he found out that they would be able to reattach his hand… only first his arm which was broken, would have to be mended. In order to keep the blood flow going and the hand alive doctors attached it to his ankle for about a month. Now they were successfully able to reattach his hand to his arm and he can stop scratching his balls with his ankle. Can you imagine what the doctors would have done if he had caught his penis in the machine?  Would they have attached it to a mouse like in South Park when Mr. Garrison had to regrow his manhood? To refresh your memory here is that scene with the singing penis – mouse dubbed over in German, because why not?

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