This entire story is prefaced with a warning: never, ever in your life, will you ever find a more depressing convergence of facts that work together in such a way as to make a tale both epically sad and yet, at the same time utterly stupid and devoid of much to garner your sympathy.
Scott Stapp, frontman of 90s mumble-rock band Creed, aka “is this Nickelback?” apparently was institutionalized after telling his wife he was a secret CIA agent tasked with assassinating Obama.
Previous to his CIA fantasies, Stapp had made a Facebook post to update fans on his well being – he was broke and mostly homeless, living in a Holiday Inn. So it looks like he invested that Creed cash rather poorly.
Stapp was committed for 3 days, after which time he went home and made off with 600 pages of Obama planning. He was shirtless on a bike when he took them. So his wife called to have him committed again but – Twist! Cops showed up because Stapp also called 911. According to him, his wife had stolen $6 million from him, and his truck (hence his bicycle). Cops determined that, if he was crazy, he wasn’t crazy enough, so they didn’t take him away.
Arguably Stapp is out there somewhere right now, plotting to take out President Obama which, you know, is a pretty big crime. Maybe the cops should have looked into that before they let him bicycle away. Even if you don’t approve of Obama, we can’t let ourselves become a country that lets shirtless, bicycle-riding ex-musicians roam about plotting massive, government take downs. If we let Stapp do it today, then maybe tomorrow MC Hammer is going to usurp the Supreme Court or Vanilla Ice is going to take the Navy’s new super cool laser and destroy the Washington Monument. It’s anarchy. We have to respect the government and disrespect washed up musicians, that’s what America is all about.
For more insight into Creed’s madness, check out the 911 call from his wife.