Potts: The Russian Bear Problem Ripping The Bear World Apart

Mark-Potts by Mark-Potts on Apr. 09, 2013

Russians are known for their love of vodka and their abilities to drink what seems like gallons at a time and not die (strap a dashcam to a bottle of vodka and you basically have the most Russian video ever made). But now, Russian bears are becoming known for their party tactics.

They're addicted to huffing jet fuel.

"This barrel is the good shit, yo!"

Igor Shpilenok spent seven months documenting bears in the Kronotsky Nature Reserve and discovered the bears love the smell of gasoline that is lingering in old barrels left there. They huff as much as they can, dig a hole for themselves, then pass out in what I assume is blazin' high.

"You guys ever think, like, how small we all are compared to the stars and shit?"

The bears are so addicted that they will run after helicopters that are in the area hoping to get a fresh taste of sweet, sweet jet fuel.

It's all very sad for the bears, mostly because they have limited resources when it comes to quenching their munchie desires. I guess it's also sad too because bears shouldn't be huffing fumes. They should be doing things bears do, whatever that is.

It's also sad because it makes American bears look lame the lesser party animals. Get it together, American bears. Go find some coke or something.

"This kegger is going to be off the hook!"

- Mark (follow on the twitter)

 

9 comments
StDavid
StDavid

okay. Well done, are you a bear?

LostKeys
LostKeys User

That's not a bear, just a hairy native.

LostKeys
LostKeys

That's not a bear, just a hairy native.

cchlsbesthockey
cchlsbesthockey

I make over $10k a month working full time. I'm an electrical engineer and I went to college and paid several thousands of dollars to get a degree, which earned me a comfy job. From there I worked my way up to make what I do now. The investment was well worth it as I can pay it all back within a month now. This is what I did >>>>> went to college and got a f*cklng job.

llga01
llga01 User

You can do this legally in Colorado now.

llga01
llga01

You can do this legally in Colorado now.

Sarla
Sarla User

yeah first

StDavid
StDavid User

okay. Well done, are you a bear?