Russia Wants To Test A Giant Nuclear Bomb Named Satan

Reports have come in this week that the Russian military is testing a new nuclear weapon, the Satan 2.  Of course this thing isn’t just some normal nuke that could wipe out a city; this nuke allegedly has the power to take out an area the size of Texas. That’s right, Texas, the monster sized state that’s bigger than ½ of the countries in the world.

Texas over europe

Texas is fucking huge.

And this nuke could wipe it off the map. Or at least replace it with a crater the size of Delaware. Of course this isn’t the only terrifyingly big nuke the world has ever seen. For now the Tsar Bomba is the biggest nuclear weapon ever tested. Let's hope it stays that way.

I don’t know about you all but I’ll be buying some extra cases of Dinty Moore stew and iodine tablets with my groceries this week.