This Teacher Looks Thrilled About Being Arrested For ‘Relationship’ With Student

There are some crimes where it’s appropriate to smile for your mugshot. Well, not “appropriate,” but acceptable in the sense that the crime wasn’t THAT bad and you can look back on the experience in 10 years and be like “Haha what a dipshit I was/am.” Examples include, but are not limited to: indecent exposure (assuming you had the foresight to not whip it out within 300 yards of a school/playground), shoplifting, public drunkenness, marijuana possession…nothing too horrible, and all crimes you can get expunged from your record with even the smallest amount of effort.

Notice how “having an inappropriate relationship with a middle school student” didn’t make the list. Someone needs to tell that to Rebecca Goerdel…

…because this chick is STOKED about having her mugshot taken. I know we’re all taught to smile in every goddamn picture taken of us since birth, but smiling for a photo at your nephew’s birthday party isn’t the same for flashing them pearly whites at the disgruntled officer who’s been in charge of taking mugshot photos for the past six hours. Maybe the photographer was hot? After all, Goerdel isn’t going to be getting any dick behind bars, adult or pre-pubescent – gotta get it in while you still can, even if it’s bent over your holding cell toilet.

According to NY Daily News, Goerdel was a special education teacher at the Young Men’s Leadership Academy at Kennedy Middle School in Texas. Now I know what you’re thinking, and don’t worry – Goerdel did not bone a special education student…I think. They haven’t named the student (nor will they ever), and the only detail surrounding their “relationship” is that it’s currently unknown whether or not the victim was in her class.

And yes, I see the irony in saying that the only known detail is that it’s unknown if she directly taught the kid. Blow me.

“This kind of conduct is outrageous and will not be tolerated,” Superintendent Dr. Susan Hull said in a statement, “The teacher-student relationship is sacred. It reflects a vow from teachers to parents that their children are safe – as safe as they would be at home.”

Goerdel has been out of the classroom since the allegations came to light on March 10th. The investigation is currently ongoing.