This Teen Went 7000 Miles For Love Then Got Dumped In A River

Love in the digital age can be rough, can’t it?  You have bots and scammers and fakers and, in at least one Ohio teen’s case, you have girls who probably never liked you to begin with and maybe never expressed any interest in you that you still fly 7,000 miles to meet only to be so rejected you get fall down drunk and end up in a river covered in your own puke.

An 18 year old fella known only as Pratt apparently met a girl online, which is to say he saw her pictures and thought she was hot.  To those of you with sense, this is the tragic beginning to a loser’s tale because if you meet a girl first by seeing her ultra-hot online photos, odds are she’s a model of some kind, either pro or at least aspiring.  So when she says nice things to you on Twitter or wherever, it’s because she says nice things to everyone.

At some point this fellow got it in his head that he loved her and hopped on that fateful plane from Ohio to Jiangshan, China where he figured maybe they’d consummate their love, or go out for dim sum or something.  Instead, after calling her and her telling him to go away and not call her again, she blocked his number.

At this point Pratt did not have an address at which to meet her, because she never gave him one, and he also didn’t have her real name, just the name she posted with online, which means to the rest of us she never asked him to come see her and never wanted to meet him at all.  At best she was flirting with him and maybe leading him on online, which is probably the case since he had her number,  but of course being 7,000 miles away she probably thought that wasn’t even a big deal because who on earth would ever get on a plane and fly 7,000 miles to meet someone whose address they didn’t have and whose real name they didn’t even know.

This kid was 18 and on the other side of the planet.  So naturally he drank himself into a stupor and when cops found him, caked in his own vomit on the shore of a river, he was soaking wet and cold.  Police found the girl and told him what happened and she still refused to see him, but on the upside the manager of his hotel took pity on him and didn’t charge him for his stay, which was a stand up thing to do for a fall down guy.

As a Break editor, I “know” all kinds of hot girls on the internet, but I’ve also been jaded enough by life to never spend money on a plane ticket to see any of them because I know the end result will be, at best, me in prison and at worst getting my ass kicked by their actual boyfriends, all of whom probably look like Chris Hemsworth.  This should be a basic lesson taught in school when you’re learning how to use computers.  Microsoft should make that awful paper clip tell you not to fall in love with pictures because it won’t end well, and it should automatically disallow you to buy plane tickets to meet hot girls you don’t really know.  This is a basic service for the good of mankind.

Let Pratt’s folly be a lesson to all the rest of us – if she won’t tell you her real name, or her address, there’s a good chance she won’t like a surprise visit from you and you may end up in a bad way, especially if the trip to see her involves going to the other side of the planet.  There are plenty of girls in this country, probably even in your town or the next town over.  Just keep trying, dude.