This isn't your usual run-of-the-mill noise complaint. The Sisters of St. Charles in the suburbs of Chicago, Illinois have had enough of the loud music coming from their neighbor, a strip club named Allure which sits directly behind one of the three chapels located at the convent.
According to their lawsuit, the sisters have seen "public violence, drunkenness and litter, including empty whiskey and beer bottles, discarded contraceptive packages and products and even used condoms," which also mentions the "pulsating and rhythmic staccato-beat noise and flashing neon and or strobe lights" that disturb the nuns. Sounds like one hell of a party.
And did they really have to describe the music as pulsating? This stuff just writes itself.
If anything is like the music on the Chicago Strip Club's website, I could totally see that working in a chapel, which doesn't describe the women on the site as strippers as they do "entertainers". La-dee-da.
After exploring the club's site a bit more, they apparently not only have a full menu with items that sound like Stripper names including Sliders, Panini's and Cotton Candy, but also prepared by an award-winning chef named Michael Lachowicz. This place is pretty darn fancy for a noisy strip club. I wonder why his grin is so big.
One of the sister's did say however that they felt the club's dancers "aren't monsters. They're daughters; they're mothers, and some of them are Catholics too." So we'll see how this whole thing turns out. It's the Battle Of The Stippers VS. The Nuns and I'm taking bets.
Discuss who will win with me on twitter @Todd_Spence