MTV put on their annual Video Music Awards, a show that gives awards out to the very music videos they refuse to show because teen moms are sooooo cool. Each year, artists try to outperform one another. Some are edgy, some go artsy, other go extreme and bring on surprise guests or perform new songs. Others go full-on slutty and no one went sluttier than Miley Cyrus did this year.
Here she is twerking. Or trying to get her digested food farther down inside her. I don't know what this is.
Here, Miley motorboats a dancer's butt. Does she know where that butt's been? Is it clean? Miley doesn't care. Miley is too raw and real to care.
This move is called the "Remember-when-you-did-this-when-you-were-seven-with-any-long-device-and-how-stupid-you-looked?" She's just trying so damn hard. At this point, it's kinda sad.
See how crazy and unique she is? She is sticking out her tongue! No one's done that before!
Here, she's letting her tongue hang out while getting dry humped by Beetlejuice.
And how did people react to this? Better than you'd expect:
Drake doesn't even want to look.
Will Smith and his family are perfect.
This entire group has no idea what's going on.
WHAT IS THIS THING?
Hey! Hank Hill made an appearance at the VMAs!
And if you feel so inclined, here is the entire performance:
Off to vomit!
- Mark (follow on twitter)