Yesterday, Mattel announced that they were broadening the Barbie brand by releasing new dolls with more realistic body shapes like “Tall”, “Curvy” and “Petite”. Although when you actually look at the designs, they fit more under the body type of just, well, “Normal”.
Which one is supposed to be curvy again?
So here at Break we decided to get real with Barbie customers by offering ACTUAL realistic body types that Mattel should be able to offer people. Because let’s face it, not everyone can be a curvy size 0.
1. Little Person Barbie
2. Dolly Parton Boobs Barbie
3. Wal-Mart Scooter Barbie
4. “You hardly ate your dinner!” Mom Barbie
5. Souless Barbie
6. Gastric Bypass Barbie
We hope that settles it. Get to producing, Mattel!
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