Man’s Real Name Is Phuc Dat Bich, And He’s Not Alone


Shakespeare once said “a rose by any other name would smell as sweet,” but certain names are somewhat more problematic than others. In fact, for one Australian man, his name has gotten him kicked off of Facebook. Yes, for Phuc Dat Bich, life is difficult.

“I find it highly irritating the fact that nobody seems to believe me when I say that my full legal name is how you see it.” In defense of every other human on the planet who doesn’t believe, it’s not difficult to see why. Then again, there are apparently several other people with that name in the world, plus there’s a Bich Phuc Dat in New Zealand.

jesus condom

Is it the silliest real name of all time?  Well, there are many other contenders. Prepare yourself for either enormous sympathy for these poor unfortunate souls, or just prepare yourself to quite possibly laugh your ass off. Like seriously off – as in you’ll have no more ass. As in you’ll think you’re Bart Simpson calling Moe and making a crank call. Ready? Ok. There’s Dr. Rick Titball, Chardonnay Hooker, Jesus Condom, Dr. Shit Fun Chew, Dr. James B. Grossweiner, Fagley Dork, Dr. Harold Ballitch II, Ok Suk Whang, Ivana Mandic and Flavour Balls.

poon ho


Why stop there? Would you like to be named Gay Neighbors, Major Dickie Head, Fa Kyu, Genuine Ho, B.J. Cobbledick, Charity Beaver, Chew Kok, Everhard Dick or Joy Hardon?

dick tips

penis breath

Only because too much is never enough when it comes to listing real names that are too silly for words, we might as well mention people like Wang Liqin, Diana Dbag, Dong Dong, Dick Swett, Man Fuk, Anita J Dick, Lucious Pusey, Dick Trickle, Tiny Kox, Rich Will Wanket, and of course Anass Rhammar.


f you

Are these the “worst” names of all? Well, none are quite as terrible as Antonin Scalia but that’s a whole different discussion.