On Wednesday this week, customers at a Florida Starbucks kept a “pay it forward” line going for ten hours straight with 458 people paying for the person behind them. Baristas told customers; “Your drink has already been paid for by the previous customer. Would you like to return their favor and pay it forward?'" One man definitely did not.
You’ll have to take his Soy Latte from his cold, dead heart.
When St. Petersburg blogger Peter Schorsch heard that another pay it forward line was happening at the same Starbucks the next day, he purposely drove down there and put the kibosh on the whole "ridiculous and cheesy" socialist experiment. That’s right; picture these socialist hands holding a Frappuccino:
Wait; is one of those hands dead? Zombie Socialists; Thanks Obama.
Schorsch, a blogger who in no way was just using this whole thing as a way to have something to write about, said “It just seems like a First World problem to me. Middle-class people sitting in their cars at a drive-thru, sipping a $5 drink and worry about someone breaking the ranks. …..I think if you really want to help, find someone that obviously needs help, like the homeless.”
He might have a point! Everyone is acting like this is such a big act of kindness. Here’s the thing; you still have to pay for person behind you. The only person who “wins” is the person who refuses to pay for the next person in line. So if you want to get a free coffee, the next time you hear about a “pay it forward” line happening, do like Peter Schorsch did here and head down to your local Starbucks and kill the whole thing, saying “I’m good.”
Larry David Does Not Think Pay It Forward Is Pretty Good
We must note however that it is indeed amazing that 458 people agreed to do this in the first place. Have you met people? They are horrible. Don’t pretend like they aren’t. Have you ever read the comments posted on Break? Exactly. That’s why I agree with Schorcsh one hundred percent that most of the people who are participating in a “pay it forward” line are not doing it out of generosity, but rather guilt. “Pay it forward” is merely the Stanford Prison Experiment, but using groupthink for “good” instead of beating prisoners. The line at Starbucks could just as easily been convinced to “shoplift it forward” if everyone else was doing it.
“If all your friends jumped off of a bridge, would you do it too?” Probably! Yeah, a lot of people would! They do it all the time. It gets a lot of views on YouTube now days.
Give Phil Haney Nothing On Twitter @PhilHaney