Man Pulls Gun On Sex Shop Clerk, Claims His Penis Pump Was Faulty

a penis pump called The Enlarger

Image Source: ridgehkr.com

Returning and exchanging items can be a bitch, especially this time of year. And especially if that item is at a sex shop.

What’s that, you ask? Read on...

  • Sex shop item exchanges. It’s a whole thing nowadays.
  • In Minnesota, a man tried to exchange a penis pump he had either purchased or received as a gift (ouch).
  • The adult video store clerk refused to exchange it.
  • Why?

Image Source: Google Maps

  • Because the clerk – from Viva Video in St. Paul -- told him that the faultiness was due to “operator error,” according to the Pioneer Press.
  • The man was obviously pissed because he knew a lot about how this penis pump worked… I am assuming.

  • So the man did what any normal man that need to get his penis pumped up would have done:
  • He threatened the employee and pulled a gun.
  • He pointed the pistol at the clerk’s head and insisted he wanted to change his pump for a new one that worked.

Samantha Bee uses a penis pump on her face

Image Source: Giphy

  • According to police, the man then freaked out at what was happening and left the store in a hurry…
  • Without a new penis pump.
  • He did say he would be back for a new one soon, though...

religious art of God laughing at a tiny penis

Image Source: Pinterest

  • He has not been identified as of yet and is still roaming the streets of St. Paul with a limp, tiny penis.
  • And I suspect he is casing out local vacuum cleaner outlets...

a nude midget with a vacuum cleaner penis pump

Image Source: Amiga

  • So a word to the wise for all of you in the market for a penis pump:
  • Do not buy the repackaged -- or unpackaged -- ones.

  • Because somewhere out there, there is a used, non-working penis pump.
  • Stick with the ones still sealed in plastic.
  • If you are into that sort of thing...

Source: Huffington Post