As depressing as it is, most of us spend more time with our co-workers than with our families. Since we are stuck with these people for so much time it’s generally a good idea to treat them with a little bit of respect if for any other reason so that they do the same for you. This starts with food; never mess with a person’s lunch, especially at work where for most office drones lunch is the one sliver of happiness they get each day as they can bury their faces in some slop for a half an hour and forget about their Office Space existence.
One unfortunate lady found out what’s it’s like to have her lunch stolen out of the office refrigerator on a continual basis.
A user over at Reddit named Toastedchillies recounts the “Revenge Porn” tale of how he took matters into his own hands and stood his ground against his wife’s office lunch thief. He says;
“I’m a bit of a chili head. Love my hot sauces. I also love to cook.”
“I also cook my wife a delicious lunch each day, She kept complaining that someone was stealing her lunch every couple of days out of the fridge at work.”
“So I made her some buffalo wings for lunch to put in the fridge. They are really popular with her colleagues, but I spiced them up just a little with some Blair’s 4am Reserve. (I note you are meant to dilute it with 1 drop per 5 liters of liquid.)”
This is the weird skull- bottle Blair’s 4AM Reserve Comes In:
And THIS is it’s warning label:
It’s filled with 4 Million to 5 Million Scoville units… A Ghost Pepper is 1 Million Scoville Units, which are used to measure the spice heat.
“So I added a couple of drops of Blairs 4am Reserve per wing with nice dusting of Ghost chilli powder for good measure.”
“I did eat a couple to make sure it didn’t kill anybody, they were real hot. Even cream doesn’t cut the heat..."
"...and Ghost chillies keep getting hotter for about 5 minutes.”
“Needless to say just before lunch, there was a shrill from the kitchen, a young male colleague decided to help himself the my wife’s lunch which was clearly marked with her name. He ran to the toilet and vomited over and over.”
“Apparently the moans sounded like he was dying.”
“My wife just sat there innocently pretending nothing was wrong. Needless to say she has not lost a single lunch since.”
Has anyone stolen your lunch at work? If so what did you do about it?
Follow Phil Haney on Twitter @PhilHaney