To quote the brilliant Springfieldian philosopher Homer J. Simpson: “Donuts. Is there anything they can’t do?” Well, we can only say “In your face donuts! Bet you can’t save people from being killed by falling airplanes!” In that sense, the donut is a mere pawn, as the mighty Hot Pocket is the true panacea for all of life’s ailments. Or at least claims some dude in Akron, Ohio.
The story is pretty damn tragic, as it involved a small plane with nine people on board all dying when their plane crashed into an apartment building. Luckily for Jason Bartley, a resident of the doomed building, his jones for some Hot Pockets led him to run some errands for the microwavable miracles. They may be high in cholesterol but they are seemingly also high in lucky rabbit’s foot power.
He was going to his local Dollar General to buy two Hot Pockets – one for dinner and (why the heck not?) one for breakfast. “Really it was dumb luck,” he said. He arrived home not long after the plane crashed and saw flames, thinking that “I left something on and my apartment caught fire.”
Luckily, no one else was home in any of the four units in the building. “My apartment was the one that took the direct force hit.” The wreckage was total. “All I have is my car and the outfit I was wearing.”
“It’s pretty devastating. From the pictures I’ve seen, I don’t think there’s anything recognizable left.”
Not that the people at Nestle, who have owned the Hot Pockets brand since 2002, are exactly happy about this awful story, but it does make one wonder if there’s a PR opportunity for them here. If you were given a choice between two microwavable meal choices – one that was low in sodium, and one that has a good shot of saving your life – which would you choose?
Source: CBS News