Where in the World Will LeBron Go?

As we told you yesterday, on July 1st, LeBron James will opt to terminate his contract with the Miami Heat early and become a free agent.  Like Kwai Chang Kane he will wander the Earth, perhaps destroying others in games of horse, perhaps just kicking highschool players in the throat.  We don’t know. 

And that’s it, isn’t it?  We don’t know.  Free Agency is like the Loch Ness Monster of the NBA and we are its Samsquantch hunters.  Does that make sense?  Not really, because we don’t know!  LeBron James is the basketball’s white whale, only something that sounds less offensive.  He’s like that one hot girl at your local comic con who wasn’t paid to be there – everyone wants her but no one knows how to make that happen.

We talked to our resident compulsive gambler Gretchen (our summer intern) and had her put her head together with her bookie Sly so we could get some odds for you on where LeBron might end up next.  If you’re the gambling sort, you may find this useful.  If you’re just a basketball fan, then this could be of interest as well.  If neither appeals to you, why did you click on this article anyway?

Odds on Where Lebron Ends Up Next

LA Lakers                            3/1

Flopsville                              3/1

Cleveland Cavs                    3/1

The Avengers                       3/1

LA Clippers                           3/1

Someplace Where Leg Cramps Are Serious Business       5/1

Toronto Raptors                     10/1

Washington Mystics               10/1

NY Knicks                              10/1

Game of Thrones                   12/1

Brooklyn Nets                         15/1

Guns n Roses                         15/1

Anaheim Dicks                        16/1

Whinertown                             16/1

Taco Bell                                  17/1

Maroon 5                                 17/1

Golden State Warriors             20/1

The Year 1985                         1.21 gigawatts/1