Dildo Company Offers Justin Bieber $1 Million Endorsement Deal

If you Google the words “Dildo” and “Bieber” on Google Images, you’re bound to get all sorts of images that your make your eyes wish they could go on strike. If you can find the strength to click on the “news” tab assuming that your hand will ever trust you again to ever make a competent decision, you might be surprised to learn that Justin has an interesting endorsement deal to consider.

A dildo company made a $1 million offer to Justin Bieber in light of his unauthorized, nude photo shoot. The company in question is named “Clone-a-Willy” (because “Duplicate-a-Dick” and “Xerox-a-Cock” were already taken) that makes a DIY dildo-kit that customers can use to make a copy of any set of male genitalia. It’s all so they can experience the real ecstasy that comes with having sex with but with all of the disappointing hype that goes with it.

Of course, Bieber has yet to accept the generous offer to endorse their product and frankly, it’s not clear why he should. Sure even someone like Bieber who treats money like the kid in “The Toy” would like an extra $1 million in cash but does that mean he actually has to use it in some capacity? And I just put an image in my head that’s worse than Google “dildo” and “Bieber.” Thank you, brain. Thank you so much.

@ThisIsDannyG