13 Times Joe Biden Was Macking on the Ladies

The United States just got itself a new Secretary of Defense and his first act is going to have to be to put armed guards around his wife to keep Joe Biden's hands off of her.  Why?  Because Joe Biden is a hands on kind of man, that weird uncle type who just insists on massaging your shoulds while he stands behind you until you refuse to be in the house with him unless your back is against the wall.  Have a look and see for yourself, he does it all the time.  Or at least 13 times.

"Your hair smells like lavendar.  Mine smells like tobacco and Werther's"

 

"So I says to the Hell's Angel, I says 'Rectum?  I don't even know 'em!'  Ha ha ha!"

 

"What's so funny?  The cigar tasted terrible, I just think Bill should know."

 

"You had creamed corn for lunch, didn't you, you minx?"

 

"Why do you keep waving to that cop?"

 

"My God, your head is a perfect circle.  Is anyone else seeing this?"

 

"My mind...to your mind.  Your mind...to my mind.  Our thoughts...as one!"

 

"For real, you say 'ahh' and we put a Christmas light in your butt and I'll see if I can see it."

 

"You don't have the upper body strength to pull me off.  Biden rules!"

 

"Those roses can be yours if you play your cards right."

 

"There there, it's OK to cry.  Let me taste those tears, I need the salt."

 

"A lunatic?  You're such a kidder!"

 

"What do you say we go get us some corn bread after this, Big Hoss, just you and me?"