JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT NUDE: THE NAKED WHISPERER

Monkey500 by Monkey500 on Jun. 25, 2014

WHAT ADVICE CAN YOU GIVE ME ABOUT DATING JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT?

The best advice would come straight from the source herself, as she penned a comedic book entitled “The Day I Shot Cupid: Hello, My Name is Jennifer Love Hewitt, And I’m a Love-aholic”about dating that offered plenty of tips. "Remember, your body is a temple, not a 7-Eleven." Meaning, if you want to try to date Jennifer, respect her holy places and don’t go fishing around for her Slurpee machine.

jennifer love hewitt cowboy hat on boobs

She also created a list of things to do after a break up, which included this nugget. "Make out with a stranger (he must be gorgeous or you'll feel worse)." So, basically, if you are gorgeous and you hear that Jennifer is nearby and newly single, make your move. If you’re not, you’re likely out of luck.

jennifer love hewitt lingerie

Another insight into dating her that she offers in the book is "I'm a spooner, I love to spoon! Like a Velcro monkey, I will suck to the back of my cuddle partner, creating the ultimate spoon." We can only wish that the Velcro monkeys that we have were half as hot.

jennifer love hewitt spilling out of dress

SO, SHE CAN ACT, WRITE AND OFFER CLEAVAGE THAT WOULD AWAKEN THE DEAD. ANY OTHER SPECIAL SKILLS WORTHY OF MENTIONING?

She has directed a couple episodes of television, but more interestingly is her career as a pop singer. Though she hasn’t had nearly as much success in the US as she has in certain other countries, she has had a couple of minor hits. Whatever you may think of her tunes, a video like the one below simply can’t help but feature her looking hot. Turn off the sound if you must.

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WHICH IS BETTER – A CRANKY CAT WHO EATS LASAGNA OR JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT’S BOOBS?

Luckily, you don’t have to choose as there is a way to combine them both. In “Garfield,” everyone’s favorite cartoon cat teamed up with Ms. Hewitt and her legendary boobs. This interview includes scenes from the movie, as well as a discussion of Jennifer being named as having the “Best Breasts in Hollywood.”

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WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE TO PARTY WITH JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT FIVE TIMES?

In theory it would be, but the simple fact is that anyone lame enough to ask such a question won’t be partying with her ever. The closest they will get is to check out old reruns of “Party of Five,” the Fox series that first brought her national attention. The show featured many chances to think about the party that was going on inside her shirt, as well as other things. We can’t remember any of those though right now, as we are distracted by that party inside her shirt.

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