Sabrina Boing Boing breastfed a cow and put it on Instagram.
Question #1 – Who Would Do This?
You could guess “crazy woman” and you’d probably be correct. However, let’s stick to solid facts for now. Sabrina is a Brazilian model, DJ, and former Pamela Anderson impersonator (who, like Anderson herself, is now sorta gross). She’s also a self-proclaimed animal lover, which we totally buy.
Question #2 – Is This Hot?
The internet is full of people with kinks. “Different strokes for different folks” is what Nancy Regan use to say. But this… this is confusing.
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These are almost boobs from an alternative looking blonde and that should be hot. But, they are having contact with a calf, which shouldn’t be hot. These are two opposing forces strinking deep into our souls, consciences, and privates.
Question #3 (skip if your answer to #2 was ‘no’) – What the f**k is wrong with you?
Boobs can be powerful. So powerful they make you look past basic decency and logic. Boobs cause men to devalue themselves, to become slaves to the mammary mountains we so desperately want to climb. This is why strip clubs are sexist towards men: we lose our way in there (and all our money). And if you find this hot, you’ve lost your way in life.
Question #4 – Is this not hot because of Sabrina Boing Boing?
Don’t get us wrong: she looks very nice. I’m sure she is fun to talk to and to watch movies with. But she looks like bad news and reminds us of those Maury guests that wear clothes they should not be wearing (then get a makeover and look fierce!)
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If this were, say, Megan Fox, would we find this hot? Or Kate Upton milking a cow? How would we react then? Does the kind of woman milking a cow with her breasts change our perception of the event’s level of hotness?
Penises are confusing, yo.
– Mark (follow on twitter)