How The Break Audience Would Use NeverWet

We posted the NeverWet product demonstration yesterday and you guys really liked it. Why wouldn’t you? A product that lets you spill mustard all over yourself and not stain your clothes? AMAZING! But the Break audience had some other ideas and thoughts about how to use NeverWet that we thought warranted discussion.

1. Political Scandal Deterrent

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It’s true. If Bill Clinton had sprayed Monica Lewinsky with NeverWet, then her infamous dress wouldn’t have existed, and he could have easily gotten away with getting a hummer in the Oval Office. Oh wait, he did. However, I do love that potential scenario:

Monica – So, Mr. President, you want me to polish your Washington Monument?

Clinton – That sounds real good. But first, let me spray you with this stuff just in case my spray goes crazy.

Monica – Uh, okay…


2. Put It On Your Car, Clothes, and License It To Phone Makers

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I figure we all thought this while watching the video. Why is this company selling cans of this for $20 when it could license it to car, clothes, and electronics manufacturers for millions? They could, but it’d be a waste of money.

Popular Mechanics points out that it’s called a “treatment” because it isn’t permanent. It eventually wears off depending on the amount of use. It is concerning that NeverWet hasn’t discussed how long the treatments last based on their experiments. If I go to a baseball game and eat hot dogs the entire time, does one coating before the first inning protect me against mustard the whole time? Do I need to reapply after a few innings? How much mustard is too much mustard for NeverWet technology?!?!


3. Pooping Made Easy

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If you want to spray stuff in your butt, be my guest. I’m out.


4. STD Prevention

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Honestly, I want to say this is a stupid idea, but I have no clue. It sounds stupid. But it is a decent question. The product creates a barrier to prevent liquid from penetrating the item that’s been sprayed. In theory, the penis or vagina could be protected. However, NeverWet doesn’t prevent oils from getting through, so that is an issue. Also, the product does give whatever is sprayed a suede-like texture, and I can’t imagine men or women would enjoy that feeling.

WARNING: I’m not a doctor. Apply NeverWet to your junk at your own risk.


4. Drench Yourself In Pepsi

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5. Get Cancer

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While there is no proof that NeverWet gives you cancer, some of you are already concerned about the side effects. I’d bet good money that the product is completely tested for dangerous chemicals and compounds before its release. Companies care about people and would never do anything to harm them because companies are people, too.

However, this guy gets it:

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5. Spray It On Women

Many of you went there. Your first thoughts went to porn, women, and moneyshots (interesting that so many of you think about semen all the time. ZING! Just kidding, I do too).

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Imagining baby gack just hitting and sliding off a pornstar’s face is kind of funny though. Just “plop, slide, plop, slide.”

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There are pluses and minuses with this thought. It seems kind of disrespectful to spray women with superhydrophobic repellant just for the sake of popping your Go-Gurt on her. Be classy, men. On the other hand, clean up is super easy.

Do you have any other ideas for how to use this product? Let us know!

Mark (follow my superhydrophobic twitter account)