Meet Mittens, The Hermaphrodite Cat

Depending on how interested you are in civil rights and social justice and that sort of thing, you will be more or less aware that trans rights is a movement that’s been gaining steam for a while.  People who identify as transgendered are just like everyone else, they form groups that get pissy when they feel other people are disrespecting them.  That last sentence would be totally disrespectful.  Just imagine I wrote it about women or Asians or midgets or whatever.  This time I’m writing it about a cat, actually.

Mittens, a housecat from deep in the heart of Newfoundland Canada (a town called Heart’s Desire, in fact) is apparently neither a boy nor a girl. Or both, depending on how you look at it.  Not actually transgendered, Mittens is a biological hermaphrodite and was born with genitals from both sexes, which you don’t hear about all that often in Cat Fancy magazine.

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Mittens owner has recommended a surgery which would leave Mittens a male cat.  How do you decide what gender the cat identifies as?  Probably the vet flipped a coin because who the hell knows?  The vet also said the cat will need to be both spayed and neutered which sounds a little shady since true hermaphrodites are almost always infertile anyway, but maybe it’s a hormone thing.  No one here is a vet, we really have no idea.

The vet bill to turn Mittens into a healthy, happy, neutered man will be about $1500 which is pretty insane.  For that kind of cash you could buy a few dozen new cats, but let’s not split hairs.  The family is selling stuff on Facebook to help pay for the bills, which is the saddest thing you’ll read today until you read that Mittens has bowel and urinary issues as a result of future-his gender issues, so he really does need the surgery.  Aww, you feel bad now for making fun of the poor hermaphrodite kitty, don’t you?

Here’s hoping the press gets Mittens some notoriety and he can get the money he needs and then his life altering surgery.  Then it’s just a matter of hoping the vet picked the right sex and Mittens doesn’t live his life feeling like a girl cat trapped in a boy cat’s body.  That’d be rough.  Probably.