A redditor by the name of /u/warriorservant recently shared his pride and joy with the world. You see, this guy is blessed with the largest second toe you have ever seen. In fact, it puts just about every big toe on the planet to shame.
As you'd suspect, fellow redditors didn't believe that the gargantuan toe belonged to OP, even after he explained he was born with a condition called macrodactyly. Thus, to prove ownership of the behemoth digit, he did what any of us would do: he signed it.
When that wasn't enough to satisfy the doubters, /u/warriorservant unleashed his inner artistic talent and drew on his notable appendage. And, yes, a penis was one of the first things redditors requested he draw -- along with a cyclops.
However, once ownership was confirmed, that's when things took a strange turn. Of course, there were jokes about Chernobyl, Fukushima, his shoe size being "Snuffleupagus," and that little piggy eating the entire market. But I don't think anyone suspected things to turn sexual.
And this ...
Moral of the story is chicks dig guys with giant second toes. Hand size? Not nearly as impressive. Sorry, Donald.