Most people have a “fight or flight” instinct when face to face with a threat, but there’s a third option no one ever mentions because it’s pathetic, uncomfortable and so all-around embarrassing that your dick may as well have wilted off your body and been replaced with a vagina: crying.
With that being said, there’s a time and a place for crying: funerals, long wait times at the DMV, accidentally drinking a glass of orange juice right after brushing your teeth – and hell, even getting dumped is a good excuse to shed a tear or two. But seeing your girl make out with some random dude right in front of you?
Nah – that’s a time for fists.
…this kid went with the softest option possible and started crying. Little bitch couldn’t even wait until he was out of the party, he went and had a breakdown literally three feet away from where his newly minted ex and XXX Snapback (a surefire sign you’re a wannabe gangbanger who drives a ’93 civic and lives at home) are swapping spit. If the girl had any doubts about whether or not this was a bad move, the torrential rain of tears flowing down that guy’s face cemented her decision for her: the dude is a bitch, and at least XXX Snapchat can get it up without “accidentally” clicking on the gay porn tab on Pornhub.
And not only does this kid get his heart broken, but instead of consoling him his friends go and video the entire thing and put it up on the Internet. Which is the right choice, obviously – if they don’t kick you while you’re down, how do you know they’re really your friends? Should’ve grabbed some dirt and rubbed it in his eyes while they were at it.
Are you a “fight, flight or cry like a little bitch” sort of guy when it comes to confrontation? Let us know in the comments!