The Famous Psychic Scottish Goat Has Predicted Who Will Become President

The famous psychic goat of Scotland is like Punxsutawney Phil only instead of predicting weather, he predicts politics. Many people actually tune in to see who he chooses because he’s been known to be correct about these types of things in the past. And well, the whole operation looks to be pretty official-looking to us.

The goat goes by the name Golden Guernsey and made his big prediction this past weekend fashioned in a red and plaid scarf and cap because, well, Scottish. He stood on a box looking like something from a circus flea market next to two clay pots holding the signs “Trump” and “Clinton”. Guernsey then walked away and when he strutted back, he chose…CLINTON to be the winner of the 2016 Presidential Election.

Okay okay but how spot on is Guernsey’s predictions normally? I mean, c’mon, it’s a fucking goat in a hat. Apparently Guernsey’s most recent (and famous) prediction was about Brexit. He correctly predicted that the United Kingdom would split from the European Union and eventually he was 100% correct. Something no one saw…unless you’re a psychic goat of course.

Here’s video of Guernsey’s prediction in case you think it’s rigged.

The psychic goat has spoken.

Yesterday, FBI director James Comey released an official statement saying that Hillary Clinton is totally cleared from any further investigation into her emails. Donald Trump however is still very much scheduled to appear in court for fraud and racketeering charges shortly after the election is over.

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