Sometimes the first idea that pops into your head when trying to come up with a revenge plot against your dickbag ex is great. Most of the time it blows. And I’m not saying that I’ve completely ruled out glitter bombing my ex’s place (you ever try to get glitter out of your clothes? It’s impossible. Now imagine that all over your house), but more often than not the first thing you come up with is implausible, dumb, or both. In this girl’s case, it was…well, I’ll let you decide for yourself before I tarnish your thoughts with my opinion.
Enter: this anonymous girl. Let’s call her “Panty,” because she’s wearing panties in this photo.
Panty and the guy she’d been dating had plans to go to a country music festival. Girl was so excited she even went and got a spray tan beforehand, and rather than keep her impending tangerine status to herself, she sent a photo along to her man:
Sadly, the response she got was not the one she wanted:
Right? Fuck him. Flaking on cheap and easy plans is one thing, but when you’ve had a concert planned for weeks and she was the one to shell out money for it…well, you’re a douche for cancelling.
Mind you, the reason he cancelled isn’t even a good one:
If your grandma dies, fine. Cool. I get that. If your bros hit you up to go paintballing and butt-chug bud heavy in a field for five hours — no. You can go chew on a lightbulb. To me, Panty was completely in the right…until she went and exacted her “revenge.”
What the actual fuck Panty! You had EVERYONE on your side and then you gotta go and do some doggy-style bathroom Bang Bros bullshit in response? What an idiot. Girl had the lead in the game all through the fourth quarter and then instead of kicking a field goal she took the ball, punted it into the parking lot and then sucked every single dick on the opposing team while they ran touchdowns in the background.
Was the guy a douche for cancelling? Yeah, but rather than making him work for it Panty went and dropped a nuke, and by “nuke” I mean “dropped her butt onto some other guy’s dick.” Bullet dodged, anonymous boyfriend – bullet dodged.