Gerard Depardieu Eats Lions; is Epically Drunk

Remember Gerard Depardieu?  He’s the Shrek-like French actor that studios tried to make people like back in the 1990s with suckholes of non-entertainment like Bogus and Green Card.  Did you ever see Bogus?  Sweet Mary Sunshine, that was a bad movie.

Despite the fact Depardieu’s film career was terrible in every way (unless all those French movies he makes are great, but let’s be reasonable), the man himself is equally as terrible in every way.  His new terribleness is the kind that is generally reserved for only Mr. Burns-style night terrors of humanity and is pretty damn baffling – Depardieu ate two endangered lions.

Apparently whilst on vacation in Burkina Faso, and probably drunk (not to be judgmental, but Depardieu is a drunk),  Depardieu says two lions stopped in the path in front of his Jeep.  Unable to think of any way to remove two animals from the road, he opted to shoot, kill and eat them.

Generally speaking, eating an endangered animals is the sort of thing supervillains and Trumps do, but keep in mind this is Gerard Depardieu.  In 2011 he was in the news for pissing in a bottle on an airplane then blaming it on a stewardess who was being depressive.  She wouldn’t get out of his way so he could use the bathroom.  See?  Things in his way causing drastic action is a theme in his life.

Additionally, Depardieu has been arrested in the past for drunk driving after falling off a scooter with a blood alcohol of 1.8, and has admitted, in a bizarrely proud way, that he ‘can’t drink like normal people” and has to have about 12-14 bottles of wine a day.  A day.  Do you know how much that is?  That’s corpse-level drinking.  Who drinks over 10 liters of anything in a day? 

Also back in 2012, Depardieu punched out another driver in a French road rage incident, so they probably dueled with baguettes first, maybe tossed some cheese.

So a drunken Frenchman ate two critically endangered lions and that’s the world we live in today.