From the Diary of Manti Te’o

Break.com Staff by Break.com Staff on Jan. 17, 2013

Dear Diary,

Such a great night last night with Lennay.  God, she’s so much fun.  We watched Weird Science together again (she loves that movie) and just hung out for a bit.  She’s such a good listener.  I can say anything to her and she won’t judge me.

Paul came over for a bit with his new girlfriend Cheryl.  Neither Lennay nor I really liked her much, she seems like an airhead.  Paul can do better.  His last girlfriend was really nice, always high fiving everyone and giving the thumbs up, but he said they had to break up because every time they got intimate he got carpal tunnel.  That’s rough.

I had a game and it went really well.  I think Lennay is my good luck charm or something.  After we won she ran out on the field and gave me the biggest hug and we danced, right there on the gridiron.  Of course the pic is everywhere now, I feel embarrassed.

Lennay thinks it makes her ass look fat but I keep telling her you can barely see it. 

After the game we had to hit up an awards ceremony.  We both got dressed up super fancy and it was awesome.  Here we are holding up the trophy I was given. Look at Lennay’s face!  God, she’s crazy.  I love her.

 

Lennay thought the night was just about me but I had a big surprise for her.  I got her up on stage and had her serenaded by a real Hollywood celebrity!  She loved it!

Anyway diary, it was a petty magical day over all.  We headed home afterwards and fell asleep on the couch listening to Lennay’s favorite song.  I don’t want to get too mushy here but I think she may be the one.  I just don’t see how this could go wrong.  Ever.

 

7 comments
Alex-Adams-350
Alex-Adams-350

You're top comment by shwing788 is a stolen joke from seth meyers. You arent funny if you have to steal someones jokes

asshole1000
asshole1000

How did this prick graduate high school?

Aggies77
Aggies77

Tis better to have loved and lost, then never to have loved at all. Unless that person didn't exist and you were humiliated in front of the entire nation for having a fake girlfriend on the internet.

shwing788
shwing788

These Te'o jokes are funny and all but lets try and remember that someone who never existed is dead...

3nder987
3nder987

Thanks Seth Meyers, glad it is you posting your jokes and not someone passing them off as their own.

naterkarr
naterkarr

The good news, she did not die. The bad news, she never existed.

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