Today in Florida we go to West Palm Beach where a man at a Burger King was having it his way in more ways than one. While most of us hit up a BK for a delicious Whopper, fries and a Coke, 33-year-old Jefferson King, no relation to Burger, allegedly went to the fast food outlet to show off his own whopper.
Either this was one of the greatest mugshots of all time or he just realized they got his order wrong. No pickles!!!
The whole double bacon barbecue whopper of a tale started on Thursday when King was seated in the Burger King on North Dixie Highway. That is when an unidentified woman says she saw King exposing himself. This is on the long list of things you don’t want to see at a Burger King; teenage employees licking the buns, chicken heads in the chicken nuggets… and some dude whipping out his french-fry.
Now this all could have been a misunderstanding, maybe he just had to make a quick adjustment of the boys, and his King Croissanwich with Double Sausage would be put away. We’ve all been there, right fellas?
Well he could have put the whole thing behind him, but then the woman made eye contact with King, and asked him what he was doing. That’s when he replied, while I assume making the face in the mugshot above;
“What? I’m playing with my penis!”
“You have a penis”
Side note: never make eye contact with a man with his penis out in the middle of a Burger King. The horrified woman informed the manager of the restaurant who in turn asked King to leave. Standing firm King refused and reportedly continued to stroke his “Extra Long Jalapeno Cheeseburger.” (That is a real menu item at BK! WTF? Extra Long? Who looks for a phallic burger?)
Mmmm… the length makes it delicious.
That’s when the West Palm Beach Police were called. Once they arrived King acted like nothing had happened and told officers that he didn’t know what they were talking about. He was promptly arrested and charged with indecent exposure. I mean I get excited for some chicken fries, but come on! It’s no Five Guys! Five Guys requires full nudity.
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