This DUI Suspect Tried To Eat His DUI Test Results Out Of Stupid Desperation

A man in New York was so desperate to get out of his DUI arrest that he tried to swallow the evidence. Either that or he needed something in his system to soak up the alcohol and the troopers who arrested him wouldn’t call Pizza Hut for him.

New York state police picked up Kenneth Desormes of Greenwich, Connecticut last Sunday following a traffic stop. A state trooper pulled Desormes over for speeding on an Interstate. The trooper determined that the man behind the wheel of the car may have been intoxicated so he transported him to the station to administer a breathalyzer test. Desormes complied with the officers’ request until the breathalyzer machine started printing his test results. Troopers said that Desormes grabbed the printout and tried to eat it in the hopes of destroying the evidence. Unfortunately, trying to eat your test results is pretty much the international sign that you’re either drunk, a goat or both.

A drunk, paper eating goat sounds like a great idea for a sitcom. CBS, get on it!

The troopers who arrested Desormes not only charged him with driving under the influence but they also slapped him with obstructing governmental administration and criminal tampering. It is not known if he’s currently in jail, out on bond or with an appearance ticket or headed out for a quick bite to eat at a nearby Kinko’s.

by Danny Gallagher

source: Huffington Post