Doritos Is Trolling The World And Winning

Doritos is a company that is single-handedly trolling us all, yet saving a nation.

It began in 2012 when they released the Doritos Locos Taco at Taco Bell. A basic taco but with a shell made out of Doritos. It was a huge it. So huge that Taco Bell created 15,000 jobs in 2012.

Saving America one taco at a time. Just kidding, five tacos at a time.

375 million of these were sold in 2012 alone. That’s more than a million a day. And now, they released the Cool Ranch Doritos Locos Taco (far superior in my humble and fat opinion) and plan to open 2,000 new stores in the next 10 years.

But now… now they’ve crossed a line. A line so absurd and evil that it might just be genius. NAY is genius: The Doritos Locos Tacos Chips.

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These are Doritos that taste like tacos that are made with Doritios. Did you follow that? DID YOU F**KING FOLLOW THAT? Because it’s the most absurdly amazing thing I’ve ever heard yet. What do these taste like? Do they taste like the original Dorito? Do they kinda taste like tacos? Is there a God?

We can only answer this by buying a bag and that, my friends, is where Doritos and Taco Bell wins. They win everything. And soon, they will own the world. And I guess the only question I have is when will we get a taco based off the chips that is based off the taco? We’ve already crossed a line, why not just f**k everything and keep going?

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Inching closer and closer to this reality…

Also, Taco Bell, get on the ball with offering these Doritios Locos Tacos in Double Decker variety. I can do it off the menu but why not put make that masterpiece official? If you love America as much as you say you do, you’ll prove it by doing this.

-Mark (follow on twitter @marksingletree)