Donald Sterling's Racist Rant Was Just His Way Of Trying To Get Laid

wookiejohnson by wookiejohnson on May. 08, 2014

He did it all for the nookie.

It's okay, you guys. We can let Donald Sterling back into our national heart, now. It turns out the recently-vilified Clippers' owner was just pretending to be a super-racist old dude who may or may not hunt minorities for sport. But why?

According to TMZ, Sterling is telling friends he only said those terrible things because he thought it would persuade V. Stiviano to sleep with him. This makes total sense because if there's one thing mixed-race minority women love, it's racism.

Apparently, Sterling thought his bizarre, racist ramblings would cause his young female companion's knees to grow as weak as wire, causing her to crumple into his firm arms where, enveloped in his strong chest, her hungry mouth would tremble, rising to meet his as if it were floating to Heaven above. Or something. But at any rate, given the fact Sterling's ownership of the Clipper's is now in jeporady, and V. Stiviano has claimed she and Sterling have never had sex, it's safe to say that the whole "using racism to get laid" plan didn't really pan out as expected.

Granted, girls are complicated, but at his age, Sterling should have realized he doesn't need to turn into Fred Phelps to get some action. All he really had to do was show the ladies his money bin. Look at all the action Scrooge McDuck got.

joasis User

Sterling is less racist than most of us. How many of us would encourage our mistresses to sleep with black guys but to just not bring them to our houses or rub our faces in it via instagram or Facebook?

NickyClickus User

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Benito-Famadico-526 User

i dont believe TMZ and i dont believe he wasnt sleeping with her already.  shes a dirty hoe who recorded a private conversation.  

mustangman6799 User

I don't understand what the big deal is.  Who gives a crap if he's racist?  He was having a "private" conversation and he has the right to free speech, moreover, there's no law that says you can't be racist- there are laws that prohibit you from taking violent action against another person because of race, but he hasn't done that.

Leave him alone.

COHockey User

Can you guys just STOP strokin this guy off? 

If I never hear another thing about Sterling it will be too soon.

it_will_be_alright User

@mustangman6799A private organization has the right to govern itself. Also, as a civilized society we don't want to accept racism which is the right thing to do. Black people hate being discriminated against just as much as white and just as much as any other human being. All of that aside, discrimination is a crime as it relates to leadership of a private organization. It's not acceptable for a CEO of a company to be racist and the same can be said here.

BlankTitanic User

@mustangman6799  He is being punished in the public sphere. Not the judicial arena. The public and any business have the right to not associate with a racist c$nt. BTW, of course it matters if someone is racist. Get a a brain.

kingdomofnothing User

@BlankTitanicYou mean it only matters if the person is white. Spike Lee makes this old white dude look like an angel. You should do what Clint told Spike Lee he could do and that's shut your face.

synweb77 User

@it_will_be_alright @kingdomofnothing@BlankTitanic You may want to look up what racist organizations Spike Lee belongs to. You might want to look up some of the racist comments he has made over the course of his career.  I have a feeling that you wont see them as racist since you have your liberal blinders on, but most of the comments he has made makes Sterling look anti-racist.  

it_will_be_alright User

@kingdomofnothing @BlankTitanic  Spike Lee is not part of the executive board of a private organization and his controversial remarks were hardly along the same lines as what Sterling expressly stated. Things like "the US gov't may be ignoring the plight of black people" and "there wasn't a single black soldier in Clint Eastwood's war movies" are hardly the same as "Don't bring those my games."