This New Anti-Bear Robot Will Revolutionize The Way We Electrocute Bears

wookiejohnson by wookiejohnson on Aug. 16, 2014

Would you like to see a robot fight a bear? Of course you would. Well, a Turkish inventor named Mustafa Karasungur wanted to see this as well, but he upped the ante by creating a bear-fighting robot armed with with an electro-whip.

Touche, Turkish farmer. Your nation now leads the world in ice cream-making technology as well as weaponized anti-bear robots.

Karasungur, who is also a farmer, invented his Scare Bear Robot to remove the blight of bears from this planet once and for all. Designed for maximum intimidation, it stands at seven-feet tall and looks like Black Sabbath’s original drummer. It emits a loud noise as it shuffles toward the bastardly caniforms. For good measure, the robot is outfitted with a swinging chain that delivers a 25,000 volt shock to anything it touches. After all, Justin Bieber can’t protect every wood, forest, and glen worldwide.

Hold on to your butts and check out the video. While viewing, please remember to constantly remind yourself that this is only Mach One.

Mr. Karasungur would like to mass-produce an army of bear-crushing automatons, but there are some issues. You see, the Scare Bear does not discriminate between people and animals. It simply responds to its prime directive of hitting every thing in its path with an electro-whip. As such, it is feared that innocent non-bear bystanders may be harmed.

Ummm, I think they’d hear it coming.

Behold, the new face of anti-bear technology.

Before you imitators try to run out and make your own bear-fighting robotic Sabbath drummer, be aware that Karasungur already holds the patent. However, you are still free to invent an alligator-wrestling Neil Peart or a Micky Dolenz that tries to chainsaw wolves.

;